"Quick note here: if this crush-slash-swooning stuff is hard for you to stomach; if you've never had a similar experience, then you should come to grips with the fact that you've got a TV dinner for a heart and might want to consider climbing inside a microwave and turning it on high for at least an hour, which if you do consider only goes to know what kind of idiot you truly are because microwaves are way too small for everyone, let alone you, to climb into." - House of Leaves
"Osama Bin Laden would never understand the joys of Hanukkah." - George W. Bush
"I go to lots of overseas places, like Canada." - Britney Spears
"A stray bullet killed one bystander slightly."
"Thousands of false eyelash factory workers run amok."
"I touch you. I know."
"Useless piece of man!"
"You look so colonistic today."
"Well, I can't eat muffins in an agitated manner. The butter would probably get on my cuffs. One should always eat muffins quite calmly. It is the only way to eat them." - The Importance of Being Earnest
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